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MR MORLEY'S CAR

Writer: John LyleJohn Lyle

I was a little taken aback when I saw Bush’s car for the first time, outside the Elgro Hotel in Potchefstroom. It was a rather grubby, white 1600 Beetle, nothing at all like I imagined a S.I.A. could afford and would drive. I drove a pretty glamorous, metallic peppermint green 1600S Beetle which had fancy rims, spotlights and a good sound system, which, when parked next to Bush’s car, made it look positively dowdy by comparison.


We had been sent to audit Wolmaransstad branch and were cooling off after our T-Bone steak suppers (Actually, that was ALL they had on their menu) and standing on the pavement in front of the hotel where our cars were parked. He was praising the virtues of his Beetle and I was in full agreement about the value which the cars represented. He then completely floored me by saying, “Do you know, this car does NOT have a battery”. I thought he was joking and expostulated that it must have as no car would run without one. “Well”, I’ve had this car for four years now and I’ve NEVER found a battery in it, even though I’ve searched diligently.”


I asked for his keys, opened the car door and lifted the back seat. There in all its splendor, stood the battery. I’ve not seen anyone more surprised – he had never had even an inkling that it was there. Luckily for him, he was punctilious about having the car serviced at the proper intervals and the garages must have made sure it was also serviced, otherwise he almost certainly would have found it the hard, breakdown way.


He never bothered washing the Beetle between services. However, we were staying at the Horseshoe Motel in Kimberley when a there was a heavy shower of rain on a Sunday afternoon. I happened to look out of my window and there in the rain was Bush, kitted out in swimming trunks dancing madly around the car and wiping it down with a chammy. Worked a charm too – the car had never looked as good before.


In the year when he was counting down the days to retirement, he often used to say that once he retired, he would buy two things – a decent hi-fi system and a massive BMW 7 series. He also promised that I could have his Beetle once he had his Beamer.


I went to see him after he retired in Port Elizabeth. He had rooms at his sister’s house and couldn’t wait to show me his hi-fi, which really was a pretty good one. When I turned the subject to his Beamer, he sheepishly confessed that he didn’t have the heart to get rid of the Volksie and would drive it until one of them packed up. I never did find out which went first.



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